Mental Illness Isn't a Death Sentence!

 

Me at the NAMI Walk 2021 at Belle Isle-Detroit, MI 

Hey Loves,

I can't believe I am writing this but the freedom I have now is beyond amazing in sharing with you all by blogging about mental health and my journey. As a mental health awareness advocate and thinking about pursuing it for a career as a mental health professional. I want to let you know that mental illness isn't a death sentence! I know there is a stigma but we are slowly breaking that. There is definitely more mental health awareness now than it was 20 years ago. Social media has been a life saver for me to not feel alone in my journey because thankfully there are brave mental health advocates to share their story. I remember sharing with my best friend and another close friend in High School when I came out of the hospital of me being diagnosed with mental illness. They were so supportive and still are til this day. I later in 2012 heard God say that my purpose was to help those with mental illness overcome mentally, spiritually, emotionally and physically. After having 4 hospitalizations, especially my last nervous breakdown and hospitalization, I felt like my life was over. I literally lost my mind in summer 2014 and I neither did my family thought i would come back. I was fighting mentally while praying in psychiatric care. One of the social workers said you are a miracle to see me come back while in the hospital from such a severe nervous breakdown.  I realized in that moment, I was going to take my medication and allow myself to adjust to the meds and heal completely.

 But when mental illness felt like a death sentence is when I thought taking medication meant I didn't have enough faith. or was a sign of weakness. It felt like a death sentence when I was in denial about being mentally ill but that last nervous breakdown and hospitalization it became real to me. I tried the not "claiming it" for 6 years, praying and fasting, taking my meds on and off, holistic route, reading and quoting scriptures, taking the natural supplements, eating healthy and exercising. I cried out to God to heal me supernaturally. It wasn't until I came to my now church home that the church beliefs were that God can use doctors and medicine to heal as well as healing supernaturally. But in my own mind, I didn't want to take the medication. I still thought I didn't need it and was ashamed of even the thought of taking it. But being untreated was costing me my mental health. It was costing me my livelihood and putting a strain on my relationships. 

Do I believe God can heal you supernaturally from mental illness and read and heard testimonials of it? YES! 

Did I get frustrated with God that it wasn't my way of healing? YES

Did I cry the "Why Me, God"? YES, MORE THAN YOU CAN COUNT!

Did I feel and experience shame and embarrassment? YES

Was I ashamed that I was label being mentally disabled after my last hospitalization in 2014? YES

Did I not want to be looked at as "CRAZY" or like "those people"? YES 

Did I feel like mental illness stole from me having a future marriage and having my own family? YEP, I sure did! I'm still believing God for a patient and understanding spouse who will love me for me and support me and my mental health advocacy work unashamedly and unconditionally. 

But I remember God speaking this scripture to my heart:

2 Corinthians 12:7-10 New Living Translation

7 even though I have received such wonderful revelations from God. So to keep me from becoming proud, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger from Satan to torment me and keep me from becoming proud.

8 Three different times I begged the Lord to take it away. 9 Each time he said, “My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.” So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me. 10 That’s why I take pleasure in my weaknesses, and in the insults, hardships, persecutions, and troubles that I suffer for Christ. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

Mental illness is not a sign of weakness or a sign of lack of faith in God. God allowing this to happen especially since it was a pre-disposition in the bloodline, was to bring all the pain, shame, embarrassment, and inner turmoil I felt to bring forth healing to others. He's literally turning my pain into purpose. 

From experiencing  abandonment issues, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, social anxiety, anxiety, manic depression, delusions, hallucinations, paranoia, schizoaffective and bipolar disorder, and dependent personality disorder...HE is using what some would call "WEAK, AND CRAZY" ashes into something beautiful. It caused me to write this beautiful blog, meeting beautiful connections and people and writing many beautiful books (you can purchase all of my three books on Amazon). It led me to the beautiful NAMI walk with hundred of people, couples, children and families. It led me to find so many books and blogs. 

Left to Right: My mom, me, and my aunt at the NAMI WALK

I am writing this blog post today to encourage you that your diagnosis doesn't define you. You may be tired of struggling with your illness and I totally understand. You may feel totally purposeless and feel so unloved but you are not. Man or woman that is reading this, you are so strong, and powerful. You too are an overcomer. You are not the lies people have spoken over you! You have a bright future ahead of you! You are NOT crazy!  Be encouraged! Seek professional help and treatment. Find the right therapist for you and doctor. Be open with them and your family and friends your struggles. Find a support group or recovery program that has the same illness as you so you won't feel alone. Join group therapy as well as individual therapy. I know it's not easy but let go of the shame. Inner healing is your portion. 

I love my support system!

Praying for you...keep me in your prayers as well. You are not alone!💚💚

Please share this blogpost and hashtag #youarenotalone.

God loves you soo much and so do I!

Love,

Sheree B xoxo